| Thought I was gonna OD on sat... lol... guess i've been doing a little too much lately... guess i'm gonna cut down on that stuff... anyways... besides collapsing at the bakery... just been playing FF lately... its fun, however seems like theres things bothering me that i cant really quite get off my chest.... for some reason in my mind, i believe that Jenn treated me well... that no girl cared for me... maybe because that is true, but besides that... what has she done to me? due to this whole shit, i started doing drugs, being depressed, doing bad in school, not giving a fuck about the family, becoming suicidal, the whole nine yards... and where has it gotten me? it almost got me kicked out of a university... it hasn't benefited me whatsoever... and a very smart and wise person had to tell me about this... and I truly appreciate that... Honestly, you're my role-model... and hopefully i can prove to everyone that i can do it, and that i am not a failure.... there may be times where i don't do well, but i swear that i am going to take care of business before i can relax... soon enough, i will graduate and live on my own... and find a better girl who will appreciate the word devotion and dedication... someone who will understand how much time and effort i put into her so she can understand that driving close to 2 hours 1 way costs money and effort... and the slightest appreciation could make the difference between a smile and a frown... anyways... Jon was pretty much right about his guess from reading my face, but like he said... "You should just drop it".... I think I am... I'm going to update in these more often, cause i realized before, i used to do it all the time, write out my day, and so on and so forth and they seemed to be really rewarding... even if no one reads it, its always good to let out your emotions... maybe thats why i get fucking pissed so easily... who knows... ---weekend highlights---
*went to see ghost rider.... (might I add, it was ridiculously sick)
*got to rank 5 on FFXI (thanks to Danger)
*collapsed
*got paid
*back to being broke yea... so thats my weekend... hahaha did a lil more, by kicking it at super, but thats about it... hahaha... anyways im gonna grab something to eat really quick, then get some rest... ill update in a couple days or so... Rich |
